Why young adults leave the church is one of the most vexing questions facing the church today. A 2007 LifeWay Christian Resources survey indicated that 70 percent of 18–22 year-olds stop attending church for at least one year.[1] Furthermore, Barna surveys have repeatedly shown that a majority of 20 year-olds leave church, often never to return.[2]

Citing a newly-released study by the Brookings Institution, Rachel Held Evans recently suggested, in essence, that millennials are leaving evangelical churches in search of more progressive fellowships because of dissonance with the more conservative doctrinal stances and cultural convictions of their erstwhile congregations.  Yet, it seems to reason that if compromising biblical convictions attracted millennials, then mainline denominations would be teeming with young adults. On the contrary, mainline churches are proof-positive that liberal theology does not magnetically draw young adults to church.

Causation for young adults exiting the church has been studied for decades, yet little has been accomplished by way of reversing it. As a gospel preacher, seminary president, and father of five young children, to me this is more than a theoretical concern. At risk of being overly simplistic, I want to suggest three factors that are often overlooked in this discussion.

Many Young Adults Leave the Church because They Never Joined it Spiritually

Many young adults leave the church because they were never truly converted to Christ in the first place. John the Apostle warned us “They went out from us because they were never of us; for if they had been of us, they would have no doubt continued with us.”[3] And in his Sermon on the Mount, Jesus soberly warns, “Not everyone who says to me ‘Lord, Lord!’ will enter the kingdom of heaven; but he who does the will of my father in heaven.”[4]

In fact, this is a troubling, but recurring, theme throughout the New Testament. Jesus frequently warned of pseudo converts, most memorably in his parables of the four soils, the wheat and the tares, and the sheep and the goats. This grievous occurrence is why Paul exhorted the Corinthian church to “examine yourselves to determine whether you be in the faith.”[5]

This predicament is as old as the church itself, and it is no respecter of age. Young adults have not cornered the market on unregenerate church membership, but with so many other pressures and opportunities associated with their life stage, their exit ramp is more predictable and more pronounced. In other words, young adults are just one bloated demographic slice of an ever-present challenge within the church today: unregenerate church membership.

Many Young Adults Leave the Church because They Never Experienced it Corporately

To their own detriment, too many churches function like a confederation of para-church ministries meeting under the same roof. For instance, many young adults traveled from children’s church, to children’s ministry, to the youth group, and then to college ministry. Amazingly, many young adults spend 20-plus years in a local church with the congregation as a whole always being an ancillary group, and with their predominant religious attention focused from one of the church’s subgroups to the next.

Age-graded and targeted ministries can be healthy in as much as they undergird the life of the church and facilitate strategic discipleship and family ministry. But when they displace the central and formative place of congregational worship and corporate gatherings as a whole, they prove detrimental to both the individual and the local church. In fact, the beauty of the New Testament church is its homogeneous diversity: Jew and Gentile, young and old, rich and poor, all united by the gospel and gathered around the common ministry of the Word, the Lord’s table, prayer, and fellowship, together as the body of Christ.

There is a sweetness in God’s people, and we rob our children of experiences of God’s grace when we neglect to incorporate them into the corporate body. It is for this reason I want my children to know the saintly widow seated behind them and the contemporary adult couple seated in front of them as well as they know the children in their own classes.

When they are disconnected from the congregation, it should not surprise us that young adults, who have never known the church as a whole, are disinclined to embrace it when their age-graded group has run its course.  Do you want your children to participate in the church when they become adults? Then cultivate their participation as they travel life towards adulthood.

Many Young Adults Leave the Church because They Never Came to Love it Personally

Though the church is not perfect, it ought to be cherished, warts and all, by every member of the congregation, including our children. As parents, we cultivate this by esteeming the church—and the individuals who comprise it—before our children. As a parent, my wife and I have long since covenanted together to guard our tongues, especially before our children, about the ministers and members of the churches we have joined.

Granted, no church is perfect, and if you ever find the perfect church, don’t join it, or you’ll likely ruin it. At the same time, a spirit of criticism and sarcasm about the pastor and other members of the congregation mark the homes of too many church members. In so doing, children are hearing reason after reason why they should doubt the Word of God, not value fellowship of the saints, and be indifferent toward gathering with God’s people. When this occurs, why should young adults commit their lives, time, and resources to a pastor and group of people they have overheard their parents repeatedly denigrate?

Conclusion

Why do young adults leave the church? This is a pressing concern, but an often-misplaced question. Instead of focusing so much on why young adults leave the church, let’s focus more on how they enter the church and how they engage it along the way. And, when you show me young adults who are truly converted, have ministered and worshiped with the church as a whole, and have grown to love the people of God, I’ll show you young adults who are a lot less likely to depart the church anytime soon.

Full Transcript:

Today it is an honor to bring my first report to the messengers of the Southern Baptist Convention, and it is an even greater honor to serve as president of Midwestern Baptist Theological Seminary, one of the six Southern Baptist seminaries.

To this convention I say that the Midwestern Seminary Board of Trustees has elected a president who loves the churches of this convention and resolves to serve, in both letter and in spirit, in good faith with the churches of this convention.

Season of Institutional Accomplishment

This past year has been an incredible season of institutional accomplishment. In recent months we have completed and are now enjoying our new seminary chapel. Included within the chapel complex is a welcome center, banquet hall that seats 300, a half-dozen classrooms, and our new 1,000-seat chapel. I am grateful to the many hundreds of Southern Baptists who have given their time and financial resources to bring this ambitious project to completion. We will host our formal chapel dedication this coming spring, and you are cordially invited to attend. The entire completed chapel complex is a source of institutional—and I trust—denominational pride.

This past semester marked the highest spring enrollment in the seminary’s history, and with over 1,500 students Midwestern Seminary ranks as one of the largest seminaries in North America. In recent months we have also hosted our two accreditors—the Association of Theological Schools and the Higher Learning Commission for our decennial accreditation reviews. I am pleased to report that we passed these reviews with flying colors. Yet, our enthusiasm is not merely in what has been accomplished, but in what we are seeking to accomplish as a seminary in the season ahead.

Missiological Refocus

Over the past many months we have been comprehensively evaluating and strategically repositioning our institutional efforts so that we might most faithfully serve the churches of the Southern Baptist Convention. Indeed, our vision is full, yet simple: Midwestern Baptist Theological Seminary exists For the Church.

My call as president is to lead Midwestern Seminary to serve the churches of the Southern Baptist Convention. We train students intentionally and especially for the churches of this denomination. We bear a moral stewardship to our Southern Baptist forebears and a contemporary stewardship of the same to focus our instructional efforts and academic programs to train pastors, ministers, and missionaries especially for Southern Baptist churches.

Our mission to exist For the Church is an urgent one. This is an urgent mission because the Southern Baptist Convention consists of some 45,000 local churches that need pastors and ministers to shepherd their congregations and to equip the members gathered therein, and because we are a Great Commission people deploying pastors, ministers, and missionaries globally to reach the world for Christ. We especially feel the urgency of our mission in light of LifeWay’s recent report indicating a decrease in baptisms and church attendance within our denomination.

In light of this, Midwestern Seminary makes strengthening the preaching and teaching capabilities of the ministers it trains priority one. So goes the pulpit, so goes the church; and so goes these offices, so goes the equipping of the saints for the service of the church, the progress of the gospel, and the fulfilling of the Great Commission.

Looking at current denominational demographics further accentuates the need to train pastors and missionaries For the Church. A dearth of pastors looms on the horizon and, in a sense, is already here. If churches do not call out pastors and seminaries do not train them, from whence will they come? After all, we minister under a Pauline injunction: “‘Whoever will call on the name of the Lord will be saved.’ How will they call on Him in whom they have not believed? How will they believe in whom they have not heard? And how will they hear without a preacher? How will they preach unless they are sent? Just as it is written, ‘How beautiful are the feet of those who bring good news of good things.’” Our love for the lost, for the nations, for the gospel, and for the spreading thereof in order to fulfill the Great Commission heightens our urgency to train pastors, teachers, and evangelists.

Sweeping Academic Expansion

To best serve the churches of this convention we have recently announced a sweeping academic expansion. Included within this expansion is offering dual major degrees at the undergraduate level in order to better prepare bi-vocational ministers and missionaries who will serve overseas on a business platform.

We are bringing renewed focus to the Master of Divinity degree with emphases on pastoral ministry and preaching, biblical and theological studies, and Christian ministry. We have developed a new doctorate in counseling as well. We are in conversations with our accreditors about further expansions to our Ph.D. program, which I look forward to sharing in due course. All of this, and so much more, is being undertaken so that Midwestern Baptist Theological Seminary can best serve the churches of the Southern Baptist Convention.

For the Church—this is the vision that called me to Kansas City. It is the vision that is being renewed and is reverberating across our campus. It is the vision that we, with appropriate institutional self-confidence, are projecting across this denomination and beyond. We are confident because Christ is building his church, and in as much as we are faithful to his church, he will be faithful to us.

To the messengers of this convention, I say first and foremost, thank you. Thank you especially for your prayers and for your support through the Cooperative Program. I also say join with us, hope the best for us, believe the best about us, and expect the best from us. Pray for us, partner with us, support us, send us your men and women to train for ministry, stand with us in solidarity of spirit, shared conviction, and gospel aspiration; and I say, hold us accountable. Hold us accountable to our denominational, confessional, and missiological commitments so that we might rightly exist For the Church.

I’ll admit it. When it comes to airplane travel, my first inclination is to be a loner. Though an outgoing person by nature, when I fly my tendency is to retract into my seat and enjoy a parenthesis of disconnectedness in an otherwise full and busy life. No cell phones. No text messages. No email or social media. This is a recipe for productivity and rest.

A funny thing, though, has happened to me over the years. There is one circumstance that trumps all others. I find myself making a beeline to sit in the middle of one seemingly undesirable scenario.

Almost like a gravitational force, I find myself drawn to young children on a plane. As the father of five young children, you’d think I’d get my fill at home, but that’s not the case at all. I love to sit by young kids when I fly. On a recent flight, I catalogued my own heart and discovered why flying by young children brings me such pleasure. Consider this:

First, children hold a special place in the eyes of God. Even the rowdiest of kids brings a smile to God’s heart, and they should bring a smile to ours. Jesus, after all, beckoned the children to come to Him, and we may hardly be more like Christ than when we do the same.

I don’t pity the overwhelmed mother on a flight with three kids. I pity the young professional who, due to selfishness, material pursuit, or 1,000 other reasons has declined to have children. I pity the person who finds kids too expensive, too burdensome, too disruptive to enjoy. The parent who feels a bit overwhelmed is to be supported, assisted, encouraged, and commended, but not pitied. Their station of life is life, and it is good.

Second, most parents are on edge when they fly, afraid their crying baby or squirming toddler will be unwelcome to those seated nearby. My wife and I know these feelings because we have been victim to them ourselves. Perhaps that is why I especially enjoy watching the parent’s relief when I say I love children, am the father of five young children, and am honored to get to fly by their family. For most parents, these words come as good news from a distant land. It pleases me to get to share them.

Third, parents of young children often have a particular openness to the gospel. Whether it is sentimentality, physical weariness, or a renewed sense of life-stewardship, a mother holding a babe or a father wrestling with a toddler are often open to a spiritual conversation. The Lord often seems to work in the hearts of parents during this stage of life, prompting receptivity to the gospel. Moreover, a warm response to disruptive children is so rare in contemporary society that a gesture of grace itself often segues to the message of Christ.

Fourth, I love the constant reminder of the biblical pattern. God has ordained the family, and a young couple with children, after all, is a sign of God’s common grace. God intended the world to know children—and lots of them. Quiet homes and empty nurseries are a lamentable aberration to the divine pattern, and for me to see a family in action is a present reminder of God’s glory and grace.

Fifth, flying by a young family gives me an opportunity to serve. Travel is an irregularity from a normal and healthy pattern of life. Waitresses serve you meals; skycaps scurry to help with your luggage; bellmen are at the ready to tend to your baggage; and flight attendants hustle at the press of a button. While nice, these luxuries can be heady, leading you to think you are at the center of your own universe. As a helpful counterbalance, lending a hand to a young parent can bring much needed help to them and much needed perspective to you.

Sixth, it reminds me of my own kids. The wheels usually are not up on the plane before I find myself missing my own children. In some small way, I can vicariously enjoy my own children as I enjoy my neighbor’s. Furthermore, I often observe a need, notch a life-stage observation, or note a child’s particular want; all of which can help me be a better father, and, in the meantime, remind me of God’s goodness to me through the gift of my own children.

Seventh, I love the adventure of it all. Toys flying, kids squirming, juice-cups dripping, even babies squalling, all bring sunshine to my heart. Life is an adventure, and life with kids—your own or others—is especially adventurous. I find myself laughing, smiling, and leaving the plane happier than when I boarded it.

So, next time you fly, spurn conventional wisdom, take one for the team and choose to sit in the midst of a young mother with, as Loretta Lynn would say, “one of them a toddlin’, and one is a crawlin’ and one’s on the way.” You’ll likely be a blessing to that family, and, I promise you, they will be a blessing to you.

“There are two days in my calendar: this day and that day,” quipped Martin Luther in reference to Christ’s second coming. We have come a long way since Luther’s statement, with most believers erring dramatically in one of two directions.

Second coming sensationalists are the most egregious, and widely lamented, offenders. They predict the timing of Jesus’ return; but, of course, they do so in vain. Jesus stated no man knows the day or hour of his return. The most infamous prognosticator in recent years has been Harold Camping, who on multiple occasions has predicted the specific date of Jesus’ return, thus embarrassing himself—and the name of Christ—before a watching world.

As irresponsible as Camping and his ilk are, one can argue the greater danger facing the church is not hyper-expectancy about Jesus’ return, but a slumbering church that acts as though Jesus isn’t returning at all. This seems especially to be the case in the year 2013. Twenty years ago, sermons and literature on the second coming were plentiful, but such interest seems to have gone the way of the el Camino car or the waterbed, an out of style fad from a previous generation.

This ought not be the case, for Southern Baptists are a second coming people. Though we hold differing positions on both the millennium and on the tribulation, Southern Baptists are unified on the literal and soon-coming return of Christ. For Christians, though, the most important questions to ask are not if Jesus will return—that is settled—and not when he will return, that is unknowable. The most helpful question to ask is: “So what?”

Jesus’ second coming is not an abstract doctrine with no bearing on the Christian life. Rather, the New Testament refers to Jesus’ return with applicability. The Bible is replete with references to Jesus’ second coming. These passages come not as an eschatological data dump, but as a forthcoming event that is to shape a Christian’s life. The Pauline corpus speaks with special relevance. Paul frequently references, and even elaborates on, the timing and circumstances of Christ’s return. In studying Paul’s many references to the second coming, one finds that the Apostle gives special emphasis not only to Jesus’ return, but to the church’s posture as the bride in waiting. What Jesus will do and when he will do it are not unimportant considerations, but they are not the most urgent. The most pressing consideration for believers is how we should live in light of his impending return.

An Expectant Hope

In Titus 2:13, Paul describes Jesus’ second coming as the church’s “blessed hope.” For most Christians throughout church history, expecting the second coming was more than the hope of moving from a good life to a more perfect eternal state. Rather, it was a yearning for deliverance from pestilence and war, a yearning for deliverance from death and destruction, and a yearning for deliverance from poverty and persecution, or even deliverance from martyrdom.

In the Western world, Christianity in the 21st century finds most believers enjoying life in relative comfort. Religious freedom, modern medicine, bourgeois lifestyle, and other modern-day conveniences have proven to bring not only earthly comfort but also spiritual complacency. This comfort often diminishes our yearning for Jesus’ return.

This complacency is frequently found in the local church as well. Many congregations act as though Christ’s return would interrupt their building program or contravene their long-range strategic plan. Too many young adults seem content for material pursuit, while senior adults are too busy enjoying retirement to long for Christ’s return. I sense that for many Christians today, heaven is too distant, eternity too abstract, and Jesus’ return too theoretical. In complete contrast, we need to live life on a first-century footing, yearning for something so beautiful and eternally satisfying—to see Jesus and be made like him—that it eclipses and transcends all other longings and expectations.

A Sanctified Life

In expounding upon Jesus’ return, Paul frequently references the church’s need to prepare individual’s lives to see Jesus. In fact, Paul calls the church to live as “sons of light and sons of the day, not as of the night or of darkness” (I Thessalonians 5:5), in anticipation of Jesus’ return. Truth be known, if our longing is not right, our living will not be right either.

Few things focus one’s life like impending judgment. This is why Jonathan Edwards resolved “never to do anything, which I should be afraid to do, if I expected it would not be above an hour, before I should hear the last trumpet” (Resolutions of a Saintly Scholar). Therefore, it is urgent that we recover a robust and expectant eschatology. As we do, we will find that a healthy anticipation of Jesus’ return infuses the Christian life with focus and urgency, proving to accelerate growth in the spiritual disciplines.

Cause and effect can be difficult to disentangle, but in the New Testament there is a clear correlation between anticipating Christ’s return and living a more sanctified Christian life. Expecting to meet Jesus occurs with a sober intention to purify one’s life, and the call to purify one’s life occurs in concert with anticipating Jesus’ return. This is why one preacher famously said we should live as though “Christ died yesterday, rose from the grave today, and is coming back tomorrow.”

A Renewed Witness

The more Christians contemplate Jesus’ return—and the final judgment associated with it—the more we will be renewed in our evangelistic witness. This is rooted in the gospel and the Great Commission itself. The lost urgently need to hear of Christ before they meet him. After all, as Peter reminds us, God has delayed Christ’s return and final judgment to allow time for a greater harvest of souls. Peter writes, “The Lord is not slow about his promise, as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing for any to perish but for all to come to repentance” (2 Peter 3:9).

The second coming of Jesus and the renewal of our personal witness is precisely where the inerrancy of Scripture and the exclusivity of the gospel intersect. To embrace the total truthfulness of God’s Word—including the soon-coming return of Christ and the corresponding truth that all must repent and believe in Jesus to be saved—should propel us into a renewed fervor for the Great Commission. The Christian who confesses Jesus is coming and that salvation is found only in his name must be dynamic, not static, in his witness.

Conclusion

The church’s attention to Jesus’ return seems to be seasonal, with interest rising and falling based upon a host of issues, most especially current geo-political events. The need of the hour is not for more end-times speculation or an unhealthy preoccupation with the sequence of eschatological events. Such interests should give way to an eschatological anticipation that impacts how we live the Christian life until he returns.

Perhaps there should be a touch of Harold Camping in us all: hoping, yearning, and even expecting Jesus’ return. Until he comes, we find ourselves with the saints of the ages, longing for the day when the kingdom of this world becomes the kingdom of our Lord and of his Christ, and praying with the saints of the ages, “Even so, come, Lord Jesus.”

*This article appears in the May 2013 edition of SBC Life.

I am excited to announce the launch of the website for Midwestern Seminary, which we have revamped to reflect the renewed vision of MBTS to exist For the Church. Many thanks to our communications team at MBTS for their tireless work on this. Please head over to explore the new look at www.mbts.edu.